Bonnie was 80 and incredibly involved in her West Texas community. As one woman told me after her memorial service, "She ran out of bulletins. It's always good to have more friends than bulletins." In March, Marc and I made the trip to see all my West Texas cousins (and especially her as her time was counted in months, or weeks as it turned out). When I was making our travel plans Bonnie said, "You know it is a really long drive." My reply, "Yup, 5.5 hours, but you're totally worth it."
"Well, I *know* I'm worth it, I just wanted to make sure you knew what you were getting into."
When we arrived we found out she had just had her first day of radiation. She was moving a little slower and definitely sipping her champagne a lot slower, but otherwise still the same wisecracker. Lots of questions and sly comments. A week ago Saturday Bonnie died. She was surrounded by her husband, kids, and grandkids.
My Nena passed this past Saturday. Nena was my grandma in everything but blood. I've been thinking about Nena stories and the one that keeps coming to the front of my mind is that she never learned to drive. Now, that is a feat in any city. However, Nena lived in Houston, TX without car or license. Houston is the capital of sprawl and 10 lane freeways. Even more amazing she didn't take buses and she most definitely did not stay home. She had an impressive network of friends who were constantly checking to see if she needed a ride to the grocery store, picking her up for lunch, taking her out for errands. Decades of living solo and having friends as her main means of transport. I think that is pretty telling of loyalty, stubbornness, and lovability.
I will miss both of them, but the love and joy they added to my life far outweighs the missing.
